Mistletoe Doesn't Count
by claraowl
Summary: In which Ren and Nora attempt to prank everyone else into believing that they're together-together and Ren tries to make the day romantic, resulting in general chaos. Rated T purely mainly for Yang (and a few mishaps). Renora, team sloth, flower power - whatever you call the Boop Troupe. Oneshot


**Yes, yes, I KNOW I need to update my Skip Beat fic and I'm really really sorry. Life bit me in the bum and then the renora plot bunnies bit me in the feels. I don't own RWBY, but enjoy this anyway! I blame azumeryl for sending me the prompt via tumblr. (Oh, and I have a tumblr now. Whoo.)**

The day promised to be a pleasant one, if a bit dull; thus, Nora decided that the soup of their lives needed a little more spice and devised and a plan to do just that. Had she known how things were going to turn out, would she have continued with her ill-advised plan?

Probably.

"Ren, I've got an absol-smutely fantabulous idea!" she whisper-shouted, bouncing up and down on top of him as he lay in his bed, desperately trying to get a few more minutes of sleep. "C'mon, Ren, you're gonna love it! We can mess with everyone's heads and then make their jaws go BOOM when they figure it out! Not that they'll explode, of course - I mean, like, _smack_ they'll hit the ground, so - yipe!"

Ren, who had caught ahold of Nora's bouncing hips in order to stop their assault upon his sleepy person, blinked up at her. "And what is this idea, Nora?"

"We can pull a fun prank on everyone this day and like hold hands and cuddle and make out and make everyone think we're together-together! It'll be hilarious!" Her cheeks were tinged as she said this and attempted to convince herself that she had no ulterior motives.

Ren had no such qualms. "Sure. I have a few ideas we can use, make it a nice date to convince everyone, plus other things." Having said this, he tugged Nora so that she was lying next to him. "Now shut up and let me sleep a little longer."

"M'kay, but only like ten more minutes, okay? I'm hungry." She was, at this point, in a bit of a shock; she had never expected him to agree, much less so easily, and so she simply cuddled up to her best friend to wait.

She awoke about an hour later to a soft, slightly damp sensation on her forehead and a very familiar chuckle. "Didn't you say you were hungry, Nora?"

"Mmm… yeah, but if I get up, this is gonna be another dream." She snuggled back against him, ignoring the growling of her stomach.

"What makes you so sure this is a dream?"

"You only ever kiss me in my dreams, Ren. Never when I'm awake."

The near-ninja let this insight wash over him for a moment. "Open your eyes."

Her eyelids fluttered open with some reluctance on her part; Ren rewarded her with another kiss to the forehead.

"I figured that I might as well start now if we're going to convince people that we're together-together." Ren was propped on one elbow, so that she had to look up to meet his gaze; he pushed a few rogue strands of hair out of her eyes before murmuring, "Good morning, Nora."

Her answering smile nearly blinded him. "Good morning, Ren! Now let's go get those pancakes!" _Best prank idea ever._

"Who said anything about pancakes?"

Rolling out of bed and heading over to fetch her daytime clothes, she replied, "I did, just now! And probably a few minutes ago when we were sleeping! And yesterday, and basically always. I mean, _you_ know me, Ren - when am I ever _not_ talking about pancakes? Basically never, right? Right! Come on, sleepyhead, why are you just sitting there? It's time to get dressed! Or did you kick off your boxers in your sleep again? I didn't really bother to check, cuz, you know, you had the comforter on and I was on top of _that_ and I didn't bother crawling under there with you because I didn't mean to fall asleep. But then, I probably shouldn't be asking about that, cuz you haven't done that in years - well, not that I've seen, at least. But then, I haven't really been checking!" As she spoke, she was shedding her pajamas and donning her regular clothes, only pausing to draw breath when she was fully attired. "Ren? did you fall back asleep? Why do you have your hands over your eyes? Ohhhh, I get it - playing the gentleman. It's okay, I'm all clothed now, you can look. Now c'mon, get dressed! Or did you want me to close my eyes first?"

"I… could you toss me a pair of boxers?" This request was met with a pair of boxers to the face, followed by a discourse on boxer-eating blankets and how they were the true evil in the world. After shimmying into said article of clothing, he tossed back the comforter and went in search of his day clothes, only to discover that they had somehow relocated themselves to Nora's dresser drawer. "Nora?"

"Nope, not me, mister magical boxer-man! It must've been a sneaky slothy steed with its equally sneaky jetpack!" She pointed accusingly at the ceiling as she said this; he didn't comment as he donned his attire; indeed, he did not speak again until he had finished dressing and began walking towards the door. He held out his hand for her to take.

"C'mon, let's go get some pancakes."

She beamed at him and took his hand in hers, nearly pulling his arm out of its socket as she skipped on ahead of him in pursuit of pancakes. Had she seen the expression on his face, muted as it was, she might have had a better understanding of exactly why he was so keen to take part in this 'prank.'

Yang was, of course, the first one to comment on the duo upon their somewhat late arrival to breakfast with an appropriately inappropriate remark - completed with a wink. "Morning, you two. Late because of a little early-morning fun?"

"We would've been here earlier, but _someone_ couldn't find his boxers!" Nora smiled, swinging the hand still linked with Ren's. The boy colored, but muttered something to the effect of if _she_ hadn't crawled back on top of him, they would've been here an hour ago. Pyrrha, aware of what usually happened between her two teammates, chose to ignore the implications behind these statements. Yang, however, grinned and offered Nora a high-five, which the hyperactive girl accepted with glee.

Ruby, for her part, blinked at the pair. "Wait… are you two…?"

"Pass the pancakes, please!" Nora sang, ignoring the comment but pointing with her free hand; the thumb of her other hand stroked the back of Ren's hand before shifting position to engage in a thumb war. She won, thus granting her the right to be the one to begin the next phase of their prank.

Ruby obliged Nora's request, watching with vague interest as the older girl picked up one of the pancakes between her teeth and smacked Ren in the face with it. Blake, upon glancing up from her book, let out a soft laugh. Weiss observed the scene with mild distaste, shifting in her seat to avoid flying drops of syrup.

"Nora, that's not how you feed people," Ren murmured, releasing her hand to fend off the offending flour-creation. "Nora."

Sucking the pancake into her mouth and swallowing it, she demanded, "Well, why not?"

"Because it doesn't work like that."

"No, no, no - you were supposed to bite the other half of the pancake! Like sloths do!"

"Sloths don't."

Jaune watched this pseudo-argument from his position next to Pyrrha, mouth slightly open. "Are you _sure_ you two aren't together? Like, did you just forget to tell each other or something?"

Ren paused long enough to give him an appraising eye; the blonde was leaning on Pyrrha's shoulder, almost unconsciously. "No more than you and Pyrrha."

"Burn!" Yang laughed, observing with glee as the two in question turned red.

Ren had gone back to attempting to teach Nora how to properly feed people, and had thus confiscated the utensils and pancakes. "Now be a baby bird."

Nora, upon receiving these instructions, stood up and began hopping around the room, chirping.

"Nora, no."

"Nora YES."

"Nora -" He caught ahold of her wrist and pulled her back onto the bench - and, effectively, onto his lap. "Open up."

"Ahhh," she sang, only to receive a mouthful of pancake. Ruby, in her fascination, was recording the scene with the video function of her scroll while Yang laughed hysterically to her left. "So _that's_ how you're supposed to feed people?"

Ren nodded an affirmation as Nora smacked a syrupy kiss on his cheek.

"How boring!" She kicked a leg out, forcing him to get a grip around her waist to prevent her from toppling off of him. "There's got to be a better way to do this. I still like my idea, don't you? I think that we could make it work, Ren. It's just like pocky, but with pancakes!"

Ren, distracted by the syrupy sign of affection, nodded without really realizing what he was doing, and soon found himself on the other end of a pancake. He sighed, resigned to his fate, and began eating his way towards his prank-girlfriend.

By this point, Arkos had recovered from embarrassment enough to watch the scene before them, observing as the pancake proved to have less structural integrity than a piece of pocky and crumbled onto the napkin Ren had spread across her skirt. Pyrrha whispered something to Jaune, prompting him to bark out a laugh. Nora, startled, upended the syrup jar for which she had been reaching, causing the sticky delicacy to spread across the table.

Ren sighed as Nora frantically attempted to lick up the syrup. Romantic breakfast idea: Failed.

After such an eventful start to the day - and the multiple dirty looks which he had received from the people in charge of cleaning the tables - Ren suggested that the pair of them spend some time in Vale. Nora agreed to this idea, but with the stipulation that they get ice cream once there. The nearly-a-ninja nodded to this as he tangled his fingers with hers once more and ignored the comments from passing students - most of which were along the lines of "about time" or "look who's being openly cute, how disgusting, I love it." Nora was oblivious to all of this, a fact for which Ren was grateful; he was hoping far more than a laugh would come of this prank, if he were to be perfectly honest with himself - but she didn't need to know that. He only hoped that she enjoyed it as much as he hoped she would.

Nora chattered happily, swinging their linked hands as they walked down the streets of Vale. The air had the crisp scent that preceded snow, and various Christmas decorations dotted the shop windows. Her earlier, frenzied pace of movement had slowed to something Ren could easily match without having his arm pulled out of its socket; this was, of course, so that she could enjoy the scenery. Their village had always held big Christmas celebrations, and had decorated extravagantly; seeing the meager decorations Vale had to offer stirred something bittersweet within the pair, causing their pace to slow further. This lack of exaggerated movement did not serve too terribly well to keep her warm, allowing Ren to use the excuse of body heat to switch from holding her hand to wrapping an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to him. She either didn't catch his true intentions or didn't mind them, tossing an arm around his waist and pushing her face towards his. He remembered with a sudden pang that she was most likely doing this in order to make a convincing prank - the fact that no one they knew was in sight did not register in his mind.

The ice cream shop was predictably empty for the weather, but fortunately open; Ren released his beloved long enough to hold open the door for her. She grinned at him as she bounced inside, the physical contact having distracted them both from the ghosts of their past. Her laughter rang like off-key music in the silence of the shop, startling the shopkeeper out of his stupor.

"One scoop of superman on a sugar cone with pink sprinkles on top, please!"

"And one scoop of mint chocolate chip on a waffle cone, please," Ren added, coming up behind Nora and wrapping his arm back around her shoulders as his other hand dug around in his pocket for his wallet, extracting it with some difficulty. He paid the man for the ice cream; the shopkeeper then set about crafting his desired masterpieces while Nora watched intently.

Across the street and behind a large sign, team RWBY and the remainder of team JNPR were crouching in observation of the happy pair, determined to figure out whether or not the pair were actually together-together, as Nora put it. Yang had spearheaded the investigation, followed quickly by Arkos and, surprisingly, Blake; the other two had followed due to a mixture of boredom and vague curiosity. They peered as one at the pair across the street, who were now exiting the ice cream shop in favor of sitting on a bench just out of the wind.

" _Why_ are they eating ice cream outside on the coldest day of the year thus far?" Weiss mumbled from beneath her muffler, staring unbelievingly at the happy sloths.

"Because Nora, is my guess," Jaune offered.

"True," Pyrrha concurred. "Ren seems to just accept whatever insanity she comes up with as perfectly ordinary as long as it doesn't result in bodily harm."

Ruby and Blake said nothing from their positions on either side of Yang, who was releasing enough body heat to count as a personal heater. Yang, for her part, was peering through her binoculars. Nora was saying something to Ren - something that apparently affected him to a ridiculous extent, as it resulted in a previously unknown phenomena.

An odd sound was coming from Ren's mouth, loud enough that it could be heard across the street; it was akin to the hoarse bark of a seal - that is, if the seal's bark was deep and heartily amused. Yes, Lie Ren was laughing - not his usual light exhalation through his nose, or slightly quirked smile, but a true belly laugh. So caught up in her disbelief was Yang that she failed to notice Nora's reaction to this event.

The girl in question looked as if she could not quite believe, herself, what her eyes and ears were telling her - but that she desired so strongly for them to lie to her in this way that it caused her physical pain. Her expression was a brew of exultation and devastation, so complete was her disbelieving joy. This sound, this crazy, harsh, beautiful sound… she had not heard it in years. That it should resurface now, at a time when she was the one to have caused it…. Tears formed at the corners of her eyes as she joined him in his laughter, throwing her arms around him and burying her face in his heaving chest.

"Oh, Oum, I missed you, Ren."

Of course, in the act of hugging him, she had succeeded in smearing his ice cream all down her front and shoving hers into his hair. However, she found it rather difficult to care at the moment; she had somehow gotten _her_ Ren back, even if she was quite confused as to how it had happened. One moment, they had been sitting on a bench, talking back and forth in their usual manner; the next, she had _her_ Ren back, the old Ren, laughing at something she'd said - she could not remember for the life of her what it was, but found that she did not need to know, as long as she had him back. The last time he had laughed like that had been before their village was destroyed. She had come to believe that he had lost his ability to laugh like that, but to have it resurface…!

"...Do any of you feel like we're watching something way too private?" Blake inquired from beneath one of Yang's ridiculously warm arms.

"A bit, yeah," replied her personal heater.

"Does that mean we have to stop?" Ruby inquired from underneath Yang's other ridiculously warm arm.

"Of course not. When have we ever done anything logical?"

Weiss did not object; she had wormed her way underneath Yang's blanket of hair for warmth.

Arkos, for their part, had grown distracted by their huddling for warmth, though neither chose to acknowledge said distraction, instead staring unseeingly at the pair across the street, who had returned to the ice cream shop in search of napkins and replacement cones, for which Nora insisted on paying this time, as she was responsible for the destruction of the previous pair.

"Do you want to walk while we eat, this time?" Ren inquired, linking their hands.

"Sure! We can look at all the decorations in town!"

They wandered aimlessly about for a bit, licking their ice cream and occasionally getting dabs on their noses. Ren was nearly done with his cone and was about to offer a last lick to Nora before he finished it when his foot hit a patch of ice. His ninja reflexes, currently tangled up in thoughts of the scent of the girl next to him and the flavors she left on his ice cream cone when she took a lick of it, were no help to him; he released Nora's hand but kept a firm grip on his cone, bracing himself for the impact.

"Gotcha!" she laughed, hooking her arms under his, having just finished her own cone. "Well, it looks like you've fallen for me, Ren!"

He could not prevent the words from slipping between his lips, nor could he keep his lovestruck tone from coloring them: "Yeah. I guess I have."

Nora, appropriately shocked by this, dropped him. Despite this action, Ren managed to keep his ice cream cone safe from danger, even as she helped him up with many flailing apologies - assuring herself internally that _He couldn't possibly actually mean that, it's all for show, to make sure that we stay in character and can carry out this prank, right? Right? Right._ He offered her a last lick of his ice cream, which she accepted before watching him crunch up the remainder of his cone.

Across the street, Yang squealed with glee. They were getting closer to the tell-all! (Unfortunately, Ren and Nora's last word exchange had been missed by the espionage group; otherwise, they would have already known the answer.) Ruby, for her part, had grown distracted by a local toy store's Christmas display and had dragged a highly unwilling Weiss out from underneath Yang's warmth to go investigate.

The pair had now continued with their decoration observation, Nora's arm looped through Ren's, Nora chattering away about whatever she saw fit. Ren commented as he deemed appropriate, such as to add to her ideas about candy cane cannons and their feasibility in hunting Grimm - that is, that it would be best to sharpen the ends before firing them. He did _not_ reveal just how frantic he was inside concerning what he had revealed to her before, after slipping upon the ice - she probably just thought it to be part of their prank, and nothing more - and _wanted_ it to be nothing more.

Nora sighed, content with her day, and leaned back against a nearby wall, tilting her head upward.

Across the street, Yang grabbed Blake's arm, grinning. The cat faunus rolled her eyes; Arkos finally surfaced from their mutual distraction to observe the events across the street.

Ren, perhaps prompted by the four's unknown stares, looked above Nora's head. True to sappy-romantic, holiday date form, a sprig of mistletoe hung above her head. He exhaled a small breath of laughter, causing Nora to look up as well; her eyes widened, but she nodded when he quirked an eyebrow for permission.

Part of him couldn't quite believe he was doing this; another part warned that there would be no coming back from it; a third whispered that Nora only nodded for the prank, not from desire; the majority dismissed the rest, however, and he leaned forward, a forearm coming to rest against the wall while his other hand found her jawline, tipping it up towards him. Her breath shuddered; he could feel it against his skin as his eyes began to close.

Nora's eyes remained wide. _This is only for the prank, it's the only reason he's going along with this, don't make a big deal out of something that probably doesn't mean anything to him - he wanted to check it was just for the prank, that's why he nodded, oh Oum this is actually happening -_ she leaned back further, her back hitting the wall - _everything's going to change for me but not for him and - oh…._ Her eyes slid shut upon contact; one of her hands, still sticky from the ice cream, came hesitantly up to hold his ponytail.

She had read a lot on the subject since realizing what was going on in her heart; the books, the stories - they made a big deal about the difference between having lips open and shut, but she found it difficult to tell which exactly was happening at the moment; her other hand braced against the wall as she leaned forward, encouraging the moment to last as Ren's lips left hers for just a moment before connecting again. The ice cream flavors blended strangely in their mouths; superman and mint chocolate chip weren't meant to go together, really, but neither of them could find it within themselves to care - after all, by any logic, neither should they, the opposites that they were. Ren's hand shifted from her jaw to the back of her neck, to her shoulder, to the small of her back, pulling her closer to him; her hand left the wall and buried itself in his hair with its partner, her back arching towards him as she fought for balance as the careful tightrope she'd been walking, they'd both been walking, was set on fire and burned to naught but dust on the ground at their feet and they were falling, falling…. Falling as they'd been from day one, or three hundred, or whenever that strange change had happened and something new had clicked, because really they had both always known that the rest of their lives would be spent in the other's presence, even if neither knew in exactly what manner it was to be. Nora gave a gasping, shuddering breath, one that Ren mirrored -

 _ **AROOOOOGA!**_

Inside the toy store in front of which the pair suddenly broke apart, brought back to reality with an ungainly bump, Ruby dropped the toy train whose button she had just pressed. Weiss, who had been watching the couple through the window, glared at her partner. "I _told_ you not to touch anything, you dunce! Now look what you've done!"

"I - what?" Ruby blinked, unaware of the flustered pair whom she had unintentionally interrupted. "Sorry?"

"Oh, never mind," Weiss huffed. "Come on, let's just check to see if they have anything for Zwei."

"Yeah!" Ruby cheered, charging forward to join her partner in the hunt for anything squishy, squeaky, and dog-safe. (Unfortunately, their hunt was to bear no fruit.)

Outside the store, Ren had yet to let go of Nora, which was fortunate; they were involved in the mutual effort of remaining vertical.

"H-Holy flapjacks, Ren," Nora whispered, shaking.

He nodded, quite unable to vocalize at the moment, much less actually articulate anything. Finally, a sigh escaped him; his head dropped into the curve of Nora's neck. _Oh Oum, what now?_

Across the street, the four watching were in a bit of a shock themselves. Blake's arm was going numb from how tightly Yang was gripping it; Jaune had sunk to the ground, pulling Pyrrha down with him. These reactions were understandable, given how they had believed Nora's previous insistence of how there was no way she and Ren were or ever would be together-together, because that was just ridiculous, right? _Right?_

Wrong, apparently.

Back on their side of the street, Ren and Nora's legs were remembering that they were legs, and their owners were remembering how to use them. Nora shifted her weight, releasing her grip on Ren's hair and settling back onto her own center of gravity; Ren released her and straightened, eventually finding himself able to pull his forearm away from the wall. The skin of that area held imprints of the brick on which he had leant, but he could not find it within himself to regret this fact.

"Ren?" Nora breathed, looking up at him almost as if she were afraid of his reaction.

"Yeah?" he managed, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

A sigh of relief escaped her as she reached up to touch his nose. "Boop."

"Yeah," he nodded, his brain whirring from all that had just happened while at the same time feeling strangely blank, "boop."

"R-Ready to head back, then? To Beacon?" she inquired, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet, cheeks stained a rosy hue; he was sure that his mirrored hers.

"Sure." His arm found her shoulders again as they began walking, leaving their espionage group behind in rampant disbelief.

Ren gave a slight smile. Semi-romantic ice cream and decorations admiration plan: Success.

Nora pressed closer to him as the pair walked, marvelling at how _easy_ it had been for the two of them to fall into this pattern, to pull off this prank. Had she not known better, she would have let herself believe that this was as real as she wanted it to be - but she knew better, and so she let it fall back to being a desperate hope. "Whaddya wanna do next, Ren?"

"Next?" he murmured, shaking some remaining daze out of his eyes.

"Yeah, for… the - um - the prank," she said, looking up at him. "We'll be around people again, so we need to make sure we act all together-together if we're really gonna fool them. Oh, but we probably shouldn't go too overboard, or else someone's bound to figure out that it's an act. But maybe if we're really over-the-top sappy they'll think it's too cheesy to be faked? Nah, that might be _too_ much. What do you think, Ren? Ren? Helloooooo, home planet to Ren, come in, my noble slothy space cadet!" She waved her hand energetically in front of his face; he caught her digits within his and pulled them to his lips. "Meep."

His eyes smiled at her, corners crinkling as they did, while he pressed a quick kiss against her ever-bruised knuckles. "I think," he said, after a moment's deliberation, "that as long as we act naturally about all of it, they'll be convinced. We could catch that new movie before we head back."

"Ohh, the one based off of _Norse Code_? Yeah, let's go!"

"Nora, careful on the" - she slipped, dragging him down with her - "ice."

"Sorry, Ren," she giggled, springing to her feet and offering him a hand up before continuing on their journey.

"Where are they going now?" Blake inquired of her personal heater, who was peering at the pair through her binoculars.

"Movie theater, I think," Yang replied, watching as Nora made movie camera motions with her hands. "Wanna catch a flick, kitten?"

"If by 'catch a flick' you mean 'spy on those two,' then yes," the other replied, her bow twitching as her ears flicked, "but call me kitten again and you'll wake up tomorrow with a buzz cut."

"Ooh, them's fighting words, sugar paws," Yang grinned. She signalled to the pair across the street to follow the retreating sloths, then drew Jaune and Pyrrha's attention to the object of espionaje. "We're off!"

"Yeah, what else is new?" Blake muttered, sticking close to Yang so as to best absorb her body heat.

"Was that… a pun?" Yang grinned. "I do believe that was a pun, my pretty kitty."

"Yang, _I'm warning you_ …."

"Two for _Norse Code_ , please," Nora sang to the ticket administrator, swinging the hand linked with Ren's while the other dug around in her pocket for her wallet.

"I'll get the popcorn then," Ren murmured, nodding. "And Choco-Grimm."

"I like this plan," Nora laughed. "It's a good plan. And I'm so excited for the movie," she added after collecting the tickets and skipping over to the concessions line, "because the book was soooo good! I hope they keep absol-smutely everything in, cuz honestly it all needs to stay in, right? Right."

Ren did not reply to this, as he knew from experience that Nora didn't need a reply. He simply graced her with the ghost of a smile and got their food, handing her the Choco-Grimms before offering an arm and escorting her to the proper theater, unaware that most of their friends were following close behind them, filing into the row three above theirs inside of the theater.

Nora's chattering became slowly quieter as the theater filled up around them and the commercials started playing. Ren secured the popcorn between his legs and put an arm over the back of Nora's seat, hand finding her far shoulder. Choco-Grimms were quickly disappearing despite the fact that the movie had yet to actually begin, as per usual. He tossed a piece of popcorn into his mouth, watching his best friend out of the corner of his eye as she carefully stored the now-empty Choco-Grimm box in her seat's cup holder. The screen flickered to life; the opening credits rolled; Nora's eyes were rapt upon the screen.

Some fifteen minutes later, Nora reached absentmindedly over to grab some of Ren's popcorn. However, her aim was a bit… off, resulting in an amusing squeak from Ren. The situation was not aided by her unwillingness to pull her eyes away from the screen long enough to see what exactly she had grabbed, instead trying to figure it out by touch alone. It was not until Ren, his voice too strangled to actually speak, moved her hand into the bag of popcorn that she realized what she had just been touching - and finally shifted her eyes from the screen, face bright red.

"Sorry, Ren! I wasn't looking where I was grabbing!" she whispered, shoving the popcorn into her mouth. Ren, similarly colored, simply shook his head and pointed back to the screen. This was not the first time this had happened, nor would it be the last.

Three rows up, Yang was nearly suffocating from suppressed laughter; the others had elected to ignore her in favor of watching the movie. Pyrrha's fingers rested next to Jaune's on the armrest they shared, but neither of them chose to do anything about this fact.

The movie viewing experience continued without any further interruptions until approximately twenty-five minutes until the end, when Nora's voice floated up to those three rows above her.

"Ren, they did _not._ They did _not_ just do that!"

Ren's dark outline turned away from the screen and towards Nora, making soothing motions.

"They left it _out!_ How could they?"

He held his hands up in surrender, moving them as if begging her to be quiet.

"How _could_ they? That was my favorite scene, and super-important to everything, and -" she let out a loud gasp as an even more important scene was skipped entirely. She rocketed to her feet. "NO!"

"Nora, _please._ " Ren was audible now, tugging at her skirt to get her to sit down. "Please."

"That is THE scene of the book! There is no excuse for leaving it out! How _could_ they?" she demanded, grabbing her empty Choco-Grimms container.

"Nora, no. Please."

"Nora _yes_ ," she hissed, and launched the fortunately flimsy container at the screen with all of her might.

"Nora," Ren cried despairingly. "We _talked_ about attacking the screen. Just _one_ movie. That's all I ask."

She sank back down into her seat, ire expiring and looking ashamed of herself. "I'm sorry, Ren," she whispered. "I did it again."

"At least you didn't shatter it this time." Ren ran his fingers through his hair before grabbing the still partially-full popcorn bag and standing up. "C'mon, let's go before they kick us out."

Nora stood up and trailed after him, holding onto the back of his shirt and watching her feet. Their observers elected to watch what remained of the movie instead of following the pair; after all, observing where on the characters' faces the Choco-Grimm box would appear to be was far more interesting than seeing whatever their friends did to deal with what had just happened.

"I'm really, really sorry, Ren," Nora whispered as the pair walked back out into the chill air outside the theater, finishing what remained of the popcorn.

"It's fine, Nora. You didn't shatter the screen, so it's all good." Upon observing her expression and the gloomy air surrounding her, he reached out and tilted her head up so that she would look at him. " _Really._ "

Nora nodded, her overactive senses forcibly reminding her of the last time he had tilted her face like this. "Oh...okay."

"Back to Beacon?" He, also being forcibly reminded, dropped his hand perhaps a bit too quickly in his effort to restrain himself. Yes, they were pretending to date, but there was no one within sight… and here he had no excuse of mistletoe.

"Yeah," Nora forced herself to smile, trying and failing to ignore the tinge of regret in her best friend's eyes, "back to Beacon."

Ren hid a sigh, tangling the fingers of his free hand with Nora's. Romantic movie date: Failed.

Beacon was in its usual weekend half-frenzy, with students doing everything within and slightly outside of the rules that they possibly could to let off steam. A few of the students observed with moderate glee as Ren and Nora, wandered into the section of the library that had reading couches. Nora tossed her legs over Ren's and leant back against the arm of the couch; Ren accepted his fate and opened the book and began reading aloud to her. Her eyes trained on his face, watching as his lips shaped the words written across the page; her ears perked as his voice seemed to sing the story to her, and only to her - his fingers turned the well-worn pages of the book he had chosen for the day.

" _...and to all those watching, there was naught more vital than that moment, when the darkness swept into the light."_

Those watching the pair laughed quietly at the startled expression on Nora's face when Ren handed her the book so that she could read the next chapter.

"Right, sorry! You're so good at reading that I forgot we were taking turns!" Turning her attention back to the book, she continued the tale.

" _The darkness had always thirsted for light in an all-consuming, all-inclusive manner; anything the light had, the darkness lusted after with unquenchable thirst. It desired the light not only for what it had, but for what it was; the light brought joy and life to all those whom it touched, while the darkness brought only despair and death. But there was truth in the fact that light could also be death, and that darkness could bring light; darkness failed to see the truth of this, withdrawing into itself to protect light from its influence."_

Ren laid his head against the back of the couch, eyes closed; Nora's voice washed over him, carrying the eloquent words in streams and rivers through his consciousness. His fingers traced patterns on her calves, tossed as they were across his lap, as she continued.

" _It was also true that light desired the darkness, with its soothing presence and quiet nature. The darkness concealed what need not be told to all, and in its secrecy laid bare everything through the silence of its domain. The night was all-knowing but never all-revealing; the light sought it as much as the darkness shied away for fear of tainting its beloved._

" _Only when the light made a true reach, one of dubious motives, was a connection finally made, and could the light finally mingle with the darkness, its partner and other half."_ Nora paused to take a breath before continuing, " _The light, in its longing, disregarded the consequences and invited the darkness to envelop it, consume it, corrupt it, take everything it had and do what it would with it._

" _The darkness refused. No matter how the light begged and pleaded, the darkness would not defile its beloved, not ruin the brilliance that brought life to so many. The darkness was too stubborn to see that the light was fading into nothingness without a contrast, without its other half - for what is light without darkness but an empty concept?"_

Ren's patterns upon her skin continued, though more slowly now; something was stirring in the back of his mind, for he had read this story before, and lived it in the way all readers do. This same something told him that he was soon going to regret very deeply his decision to have them read this particular tale aloud in a public setting.

" _But eventually the light convinced the darkness of this truth, and the darkness swept into the light. They connected as only light and darkness can, as only the two ever could - a beautiful clash of opposites and contrast, melding together into the twiflit and predawn hours, those times when light and dark can lie together again and -_ " Nora broke off there and looked up at Ren, whose head had snapped up in alarm. "Yes, Ren?"

"I've read this book before. Do _not_ read the next scene aloud."

"But then why-?"

"Because I forgot. Book, please, Nora."

She smirked and simply leaned backwards to finish reading the chapter, albeit silently. This was fortunate, as what was included in the following pages was severe enough to make Blake blush. She looked back up at him with wide, wondering eyes. "Ren…?"

"The description lied to me, Nora. And you do have to admit that the rest of the story is compelling."

"Yeah, even if it has really detailed scenes of opposite characters knocking boots. I can see why you like it, Ren." Of course, as Nora is Nora and therefore speaks at top volume at all times, everyone within earshot heard this remark. Nora, upon realizing this, continued, "Yeah, we should probably go."

Ren buried his face in his hands. Romantic reading aloud to one another plan: Failed.

After the last disaster, the pair had retreated outside to watch the other students of Beacon go about their activities. Of course, as Nora was involved in this plan, they were doing so as sloths from a nearby tree. Let it never be said that Lie Ren's life was boring, for it had always included Nora Valkyrie, and boring flees before her. Fortunately for Ren's aching hands, a passing student overheard one of Nora's comments, forcing the pair to drop from the tree (startling several nearby students) and make a dash back to their dorm. The now-freezing pair, upon bursting back into the deserted room - for their friends were still wandering around Vale in search of them - decided that hot chocolate was in order. While Nora dashed off to snitch some marshmallows from Ruby's stash (which she rationalized by the fact Ruby had 'borrowed' her backup bottle of syrup the previous week), Ren fetched the necessary items for making hot chocolate, and by the time Nora had returned bearing marshmallows and Zwei, he had two steaming mugs ready.

"Aw, but now the marshmallows aren't warm enough!" Nora sighed, looking between the perfect mugs of hot chocolate and the bag of vaguely stale marshmallows in her hand.

"Won't they warm up when we put them in the drinks?" Ren inquired, placing the mugs on a nearby table and relieving Nora of Zwei.

"Yeah, but then the hot chocolate will cool down from the perfect temperature you always get it to!" A thought struck her. "Oh, right! I'll just pop these into the microwave for a little bit! That'll get them nice and toasty warm!"

Ren was too caught up in petting Zwei to register the danger of Nora's previous words, instead just nodding. She implemented her plan, then returned to pet Zwei as well.

 **BOOM.**

"Nora?"

"Yes, Ren?"

"Please tell me you didn't put the entire bag of marshmallows in the microwave."

"Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies, Ren."

"What am I going to do with you, Nora?"

"I think you should start by helping me put out that fire."

"That's probably the most logical course of action."

" _I_ thought so. Shall we?"

He sighed. "I suppose that we shall."

Hot chocolate with marshmallows plan: Failed.

Some time later, the sticky pair was sipping what was now essentially chocolate milk and petting an equally sticky Zwei, who had of course consumed as much of the marshmallow mess as possible. Fortunately, Zwei would remain healthy, as he was made of tougher stuff than the average dog. He rolled around at the foot of Ren's bed while the humans sprawled together up near the pillows, sipping their drinks. "Y'know, Ren, this still tastes really good cold."

He chuckled, scooting a little closer to her. "Glad to hear it."

"I mean, whatever you make _always_ taste really good, cuz you made it, cuz you're so good at cooking things." She smiled and leaned up against him, her hair tickling his neck. "Well, not just cooking-cooking but like - yeah." He could feel her laughter more than hear it. "You're just good at _everything_ , I guess."

"Not everything," he murmured. _I couldn't have dreamed of doing something similar to this without you instigating it, or coming up with such a convenient excuse… you do realize that no one can see us doing this, right? That there's nothing to add to the prank from us acting like this in private? Unless Zwei is a good enough audience for you… what are you planning, Nora? You can't possibly be serious about this, can you? After all this time? No, that's just ridiculous… light only goes for darkness in fairy tales._

"Mmm… I _guess_ not. You've never really been good at brushing your own hair," she reflected, draining the last dregs of her drink. "Speaking of which, the wind did a right number on it; it's all tangled up in knots! We should really get the knots out as soon as possible. Plus, it's been a while since I braided it…." She trailed off, tilting her head up to look at him hopefully.

He finished his drink and set his mug (well, hers; somehow they had managed to switch symbol mugs in the process of cleaning up the marshmallows) on the nightstand. "Sound like a plan."

"Can I braid a ribbon into it?" she inquired, hopping off of the bed to fetch the hairbrush and mister.

"Sure, whatever you want, lightning bug." This pet name slipped out without his meaning to; she stilled for a moment before turning around to give him a smile fitting of the name. She then skipped back over to him, bearing the necessary supplies - a hairbrush, a mister, a hair towel, and a long, pink ribbon; he sat up. "Music?"

"Will you sing for me?" she inquired, crawling onto the bed behind him and rising onto her knees.

"Always." He started humming first, testing which tune felt right, finally deciding upon one of the Christmas tunes he'd heard at some point during their outing earlier.

Nora swayed back and forth as she brushed out the tangles in his hair, removing the pony tail holder as she went and wrapping the hair towel around his shoulders. After misting his hair, she returned to brushing it, still swaying to the slightly off-key tune. She added her off-pitch humming to the mix as she began separating it to braid and reached over to tug the ribbon away from Zwei. The puppy relinquished his grip easily, given that he was asleep. Ren finished the first song and slipped into the next, smiling at the sensation of Nora's touch as she wove the ribbon into his tri-parted hair.

After tying off the end, Nora leaned forward, pushing her body weight onto Ren as she slung her arms around his shoulders. "Slothhhhhhhh blanketttt."

"Jet pack," Ren replied, hands lifting to secure her arms to him, having a sudden mental image of the pair of them rocketing off into the sunset.

"Mmm… I wonder if the others are back yet," she murmured against the back of his neck, her lips brushing it with every word she spoke.

"Probably? I don't care," he murmured, realizing the truth of this statement. "I really prefer it when they're not around."

"Aww," she giggled, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck. "Who's the sappy romantic now?"

"Me. One of us has to be, lightning bug," he chuckled.

"Says who?"

"Says me," he retorted, standing up and pulling her up with him. She clung to his back, slothlike, as he set out into the hallways in search of other human beings. They had a brief run-in with Velvet, who smiled and wished them a Happy Christmas before retreating to her dorm room, where she informed them that her teammates had started a movie, if the pair would like to join them later. They thanked her but declined, instead accepting her offer to join them the next night for yet another movie - team CFVY always marathoned Christmas movies around the holidays. The noble slothy steed and his jetpack continued on their way, unfortunately passing a group who decided that Ren's braid looked dumb. Nora understandably took offence to this and would have exercised her ire on the provokers had Ren not had a firm grip on her legs. As it was, she attempted to get at them with her arms, nearly causing Ren to overbalance until he backed her up against the wall.

"Nora, pay them no mind."

"They insulted you! And my braiding skills!"

"They're just jealous that they don't have something similar. C'mon, let's go back to the dorm."

"Similar?"

Ren did not answer, leaving Nora to ponder the question while resting against his back. She felt him sigh.

Operation hot chocolate and hair-braiding: Almost a success.

"Nora."

"Yes, Ren?" she inquired, slipping off of his back and waving hello to a now-awake Zwei back in JNPR's dorm room.

"I vote, since Jaune and Pyrrha are still not back, that we build a blanket fort."

This idea was met by overly enthusiastic squeals and a tackle-hug from behind, bringing them both crashing to the floor. Zwei hopped off of the end of the bed to join them, licking both of their faces until they moved. Ren let out a soft laugh and rolled to his feet, then offered Nora a hand up - only to find her observing him with a complicated expression on her face.

"Nora?" he murmured, hand still extended.

His voice seemed to snap her back to reality; she shook her head before accepting his hand and bouncing to her feet. "Sorry, sorry! I was just - distracted! Hurrah for blanket forts!" She forced her traitorous thoughts to the back of her mind - the ones that were reminding her that this all would be over as soon as she went to sleep that night, that she could never have this again… that this probably meant nothing to the one whom she knew to be her other half. "Banzai!"

The pair set about making the most complex blanket fort possible, including all four beds, every blanket and pillow within sight, and all of their clean towels. Zwei debated joining them, but upon viewing its sketchy structural integrity he decided to retreat to Blake's bed across the hall. Nora waved farewell to the departing pup as Ren turned on some music for the pair of them.

 _/I can't catch lightning/_

She spun around, slamming the door as she went, and launched herself at Ren. "C'mon, let's dance!"

"But the blanket fort -"

"We can use that once we're tired! I'm too excited right now!" _If I stop moving, I'm going to dwell more on the end. I need to enjoy this as much as possible for as long as I can before we go back to normal… well, what's normal for us._ She grabbed his hands and began dancing, dragging him along with her for a few moments until he got his feet under himself again. The corners of Ren's eyes crinkled in mirth as they twirled around and around, sliding a little on the blankets strewn haphazardly around them. Nora beamed up at him, leaning back as they spun around before pulling closer to him. And then Ren was laughing again, more softly this time but definitely laughing, his hand coming to the small of Nora's back as they danced, the other tangled with one of hers; and they were turning and moving without ceasing, slipping and sliding on the blankets around them -

Then suddenly they were falling, skidding, and landing in a heap amid their blanket fort, which promptly collapsed atop them. "Tired enough now?" he inquired. She did not reply outside of a laugh as she wiggled against him, trying to figure out the best way for the pair of them to move. As it transpired, there was no good way for them to move; their elaborate blanket fort plans had backfired, leaving them trapped. This seemed a bit improbable, given who they were, but there was also a certain lack of willingness to move out of each other's arms to be taken into account.

"Am I squishing you at all?" she whispered, upon finding that they were caterpillars ensconced in a cocoon of blankets from which they did not yet have the wings to escape.

He shook his head, tangling his fingers in her hair. "You're fine." _I need to know you're here, to know that you'll stay with me after today's over and done with. What were your plans for this prank, Nora? What did you expect to come of giving me so much false hope?_

"Hey, Ren?" She continued at that same volume, pressing upward as much as the blankets would allow her so that she could see him better, "We've cuddled and held hands so far, but… we haven't done one of the parts of the prank."

"What about… earlier?" _Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?_

"You of all people should know that mistletoe doesn't count, Ren. Besides, I'm pretty sure that Yang rigged that somehow."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I heard her mumbling about it a few days ago."

Their faces were drifting closer as they spoke of plants and Yangs and other such trivial things, Nora's fingers tracing a pattern on Ren's neck while his tangled in her hair. Nora was struck once again by how _easy_ , how _natural_ , even, it was for them to be like this, sharing air and space and saliva. This time, the flavors meshed, being one in the same as they were, hot chocolate times two; so too did the darkness around them fit with the light each of them swore shone from the other's eyes whenever the lids flickered open. It wasn't perfect; they were somewhat awkward in their movements, bumping noses and jaws and getting hair in eyes and mouths. There was sweat involved as well, since they were buried in blankets and unable to extricate themselves; Nora compensated for this by pawing at the fastenings on Ren's shirt until they came undone, letting what was left of the coolness in the air touch his skin; she could feel her skirt hiking up in the back, could feel Ren's cold fingers helping it along. She shuddered, but not from any chill she felt; the blankets around them prevented that. There was a new subtlety in Ren's flavor and in his movements now, though she could not place how nor why, only that there was. The chill of his fingers scuttled up and down the backs of her thighs, causing them to hitch forward against him; and it was his turn to shudder, at the feel of her, the one whom he had held so close to him for so long but never been able to touch, whom he had never had reach for him, and his hands were going higher up her legs as her fingers splayed against his chest, tracing, holding, controlling - Oum, did she even know what she was doing, because he sure didn't, but somehow it seemed to work…. They were bumping jaws and getting saliva everywhere, boiling under all these blankets yet their fingers were freezing, perhaps from how much time they had spent outside, but the hot chocolate should have taken care of that….

It was amazingly easy for them to continue, to push beyond the boundaries they'd set all those years before, unknowingly; yet they dared not go beyond where they were now, for reasons they found unnecessary to explain, not least of all because _this is only for today, only for the prank, don't get your hopes up…._

And then, quite suddenly, they were bereft of their cozy blanket hollow and found themselves sprawled all over one another on the cold floor.

"I _KNEW_ IT, I _TOLD_ THEM IT WAS TOO REAL TO BE FAKED!"

"Jaune!" Pyrrha yelped from behind where he was holding the remains of their failed blanket fort with a great sense of triumph.

Yang, who had skidded into the scene behind them, gave a low whistle at the pair's heated, partially-dressed state. "Well, I'll be damned. I didn't think they'd be _this_ far along. Hey, Blakey, I owe ya a bowl of salmon!"

"No, no, wait!" Nora yelped, sitting up as straight as was possible, given that Ren was half on top of her. "You've got it all wrong! We're not-"

But Ren had reached up and pulled her down to him, silencing her protests of not being 'together-together' - using the excuse to himself that she would thank him later for preserving their prank. He kept this one quick, just long enough to cut off her next pair of hyphenated words. He then rolled to a standing position, helped his temporarily dumbstruck best friend to her feet, and gave a sarcastic little salute to their three friends, straight-faced. With a gentle motion of his hand, he shooed the snickering Yang away and ushered in the other two members of his team, then shut the door behind them, sighing.

Planned romantic dancing followed by equally adorable blanket fort: Failed.

Unplanned collapse of blanket fort: Wildly Successful.

The music was lower, now, and all four of them had had their showers; Ren and Nora were sprawled on the latter's bed, Ren's head a bit lower than Nora's. It was an extremely comfortable position, but his pillow was slightly out of alignment; he attempted to fluff it for a good thirty-five seconds before he realized exactly _why_ Nora was making such surprised squeaking sounds, and then sat up with a jolt.

"Oh Oum Nora that's your - I'm so sorry, I thought - I, uh…" his voice trailed off and his cheeks reddened; he was well aware of the stares of his other two teammates.

She merely laughed and assured him that it was alright - it was just her, after all - before falling silent once more and twirling his braid between her fingers pensively. He let her, wondering to himself what he could possibly do to convince her that it was never _just_ her, what he could do to convince her that she was his world, had always been. Her thoughts were parallel, luxuriating in these moments, knowing that nothing like this could come again, it was too selfish a thought….

"Nora?" Ren murmured, scooting up so that their eyes were parallel. "You've been way too quiet for the past couple of hours. What's up?"

"Nothing, I just…." She swallowed, hard, as his arm draped casually across her waist. "I just… I've… this has been an amazing day, and I really… well…."

His fingers traced her jaw, as if begging her to confide in him, to speak as easily as she always did.

Her voice dropped a little lower as the words began dripping from her like warming molasses. "I just… I thought this… this so-called prank… would be… fun. A-And it was! It really, really was! I was really glad to hear you laugh again, especially since you h-haven't in so long. I just don't want it… I just…" Here she paused and took a deep breath, steeling herself, before letting her words gush out: " I just really really enjoyed today and I don't want it to end, I _thought_ I'd be okay with going back to normal but I'm _not,_ I'm _not_! Cuz now I've had a taste of what it could be like to be _with_ you not just by you and I don't want it to end, but I don't want to ruin anything either, and I just…." Her voice broke; her eyes were clamped shut, preventing her from seeing the flurry of emotions that flicked through Ren's eyes while she spoke.

The sensation of having the back of Ren's hands traced against her jawline caused her eyes to flicker open to view an almost accusatory expression on his face.

"I thought you knew me better than that, lightning bug." Nora flinched, but he continued, "And I thought I knew you better than that. Want to know why?"

She nodded, looking abashed.

"We are both absolute _morons_." A soft smile curved his mouth. "Do you have any idea how long I've been trying to figure out how to tell you how long I've wanted to do this?"

She shook her head, a few giggles beginning to escape.

"Way, way, _way_ too long." He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"So we… we can continue this? Being together-together? But for real?"

"As long as you want."

"Even forever?"

He nodded. "I mean, aside from a few things, we've pretty much acted like that already."

She laughed.

This would have been a very sweet, sappy ending scene had Jaune and Pyrrha not been in the room. As it was, Pyrrha was recording a video of the happenings - with the sound as high as it would go - and Jaune was giggling maniacally. Ren, from his position on Nora's bed, lifted one of his hands into the air and flipped off his team leader (as Ren is Ren and therefore secretly really vulgar), sending Pyrrha into a fit of laughter and bringing an end to the video recording. This was unfortunate, as it meant that Ren's sappiest line yet was missed.

"Y'know," he murmured, tugging one of the blankets still strewn around the room over them, "today has been a good day."

"Oh, really?" Nora replied, scooching closer and tossing a leg over him as was typical of her. "How so?"

"Any day is a good day when it starts and ends in your arms."

"You are _such_ a sap."

"Good thing you love syrup so much."

Nora laughed. "Isn't that one of the truest things ever said."

"Okay," came Jaune's voice from across the room, interrupting their adorable little moment, "I'm happy for you and all, but get a room."

"This _is_ our room," Ren shot back, and proceeded to celebrate that fact - with Nora's help, of course.

Pyrrha laughed as she reached over to turn out the light, reflecting that she would be treating Yang to a nice big bowl of ramen the next day.

Overall, Ren reflected, the day as a whole: Rampant success.

 **Well, that was far longer than I planned. Hope y'all enjoyed it. Merry Christmas, and I hope you all start your New Year off with a Yang. ;D Drop me a review below to let me know how you liked it!**


End file.
